News International

Here at News International
We believe in the power of news

We’re all about the average man on the street
So long as he has the ability to better himself
Or he’s suitably deferent to his betters

And if the public are interested
It’s in the public interest
We’re interested in interesting the public
Or at least keeping them interested
Lest they question our interests

We care deeply about our journalists
So long as they’re well behaved
And break the law when we tell them to
Unless they’re found out, of course
We wouldn’t want to associate ourselves with criminality

That said, you can forgive our editors
For getting a little upset
When their staff are arrested on charges of corruption and bribery
The press should remain free of state regulation
So we can better serve you, the consumer

Remember, everyone has the right to a private life
Free of interference
From anyone
But us

Reading etc.

The Sun’s hypocrisy laid bare (Ruth)

Phone hacking: timeline of the scandal (The Telegraph)