Now I don’t like pasties and I don’t like ale
But minimum pricing? It’s just full of fail
It’s tax on the poorest and prejudiced too
When middle-class drinkers in town centres spew

You will not take our pasties
You will not take our beer
You will not take our pasties
You will not take our beer

You will not take our takeaways
And our resolve is clear
You will not take our pasties
You will not take our beer

Fuck all the proles drinking cider with ice
We’ll destroy their future then remove their vice
As for ourselves, well each to their own
Mine’s a bottle of Côtes du Rhône

You will not take our pasties
You will not take our beer
You will not take our pasties
You will not take our beer

You will not take our takeaways
And our resolve is clear
You will not take our pasties
You will not take our beer

—

‘Pastygate’ reaches fever pitch (Bakeryinfo.co.uk)

Coalition to set minimum alcohol price (The Guardian)

Our drink laws are driven by middle-class hypocrites (Catherine Bennett)